Black Droplets

                Have you ever observed something unusual? Once, I observed a rock, one beautiful rock. It was as pitch-black as a coal, but still as shiny as a black pearl. The rock was just as big as my fist but it was solid and strong. It stayed under a stalactite that expelled water drop by drop. After several weeks, I found that rock still on its place. However, the shape was a bit different. Its surface was somehow wavy. Perhaps it was caused by the water constantly dropping from the stalactite. Then I took the rock and moved it to another place where there were no droplets, then wondered. If the rock stayed on its original place for a year or more, holes would be formed on its surface.

 

                Well, if you were me, you might just left it there because it was nothing, but have you ever thought about its life? What if the droplets pierced the rock? Would it be the end of its life? Yes, I fancied the rock to have life, just like humans. I know it sounds weird but I simply portrayed it like our lives. Let’s just imagine the rock there as our lives and the droplets as the incoming problems in our lives. Have you ever been wedge in your problem? What if your life is being destroyed by your problems?

                

                I’ve been in such situation. People saw me like that flawless rock from the outside, strong and beautiful. It seemed like everything was fine; nothing wedged me, always cheerful in every condition. Well, for a moment, yes, it was like that. Anyhow, everyone, even myself, didn’t realize those tiny droplets that continuously dropped in my rock. Without realizing it, I grew up under continuous problems that wedging me. It changed my characters, my paradigm, and over all, it changed my life.

                I was a strong, confident girl who has grown up to be a young lady with lots of fear. Fear to overcome something new, to know other people, to do the same mistakes again, etc. I’m scared to face something new, not because it’s hard to do, but because I have little confidence left in me and it makes me over think every problem I face.

                I knew that I wasn’t the old me. Well yeah, just came to realize that my problems ‘destroyed’ me. “I need a change in my life!” I need to change the way I faced the problems. I don’t want to be ‘destroyed’ by my problems anymore, like the rock that is constantly dropped by the droplets. That’s why I am trying to make a change in my life, hoping for a better way, just like moving the rock to a better place. But it doesn’t mean avoiding my problems. It means to overcome the problems, even if it’s my darkest problem, like a ‘black droplet’.